I don’t know that I’ve got a cohesive topic for today. I’ve been avoiding writing a new post for that very reason. Current thoughts. How about a list?
1. Death–My uncle died recently and I traveled back East for the funeral. The trip was like an experience in Zen time travel with past, present and future all jammed up together. Do we ever really put memories to rest? I thought I had, but there are triggers and things resurface.
2. School–There’s about a month left of school for the girls. Izzy will graduate from 8th grade and Amalia will leave elementary school and Ocean Charter. We’re leaving behind some great teachers. On the parent end of things, there’s a big, ugly mess going on. But I can’t write about that here. At least not yet. I know I’ll cry at Izzy’s graduation and it will be strange to walk off campus on June 11th knowing I’m no longer a parent at OCS, but it will also be a relief. It’s time to go.
3. Writing–No poetry lately. Inconsistent stabs at an essay. An idea for another and yet another. I need to finish something.
4. Work–Maybe I should look for a job? (Aside from taking care of the house and girls.) Hmmm. What would that job be? Short on marketable skills.
5. Spinoza & God & Anne Frank’s mother–Reading Spinoza for one of my essays. Deep, complicated, nature of existence stuff. Philosophers seem to break the basic rules of writing. Lots of abstract statements and very few concrete examples. Stay tuned for the essay on Edith Frank.
I think it’s time to get to work on that essay. I’m not very patient with the whole writing process. Poems are easier in the sense that I usually get a first draft down in one sitting and then go back for research and editing. But at the end of the day there’s something finished enough to print out. I tend to carry these new poems around with me in my back pocket and reread them at stoplights when I go to pick the girls up at school. It’s nice having something to hold in one’s hand. The essay process requires sustained focus and the discipline of not getting caught up in tangential research. Perhaps this current piece will prove to be my learning curve and the next essay won’t take so incredibly long. Then again…it will be summer and the girls will be off from school. Oh dear.
What does your list look like today?